-
When I Stopped Feeling Aligned
Nothing was overtly wrong with the work. What shifted was the quiet realization that I was no longer moving in the same direction as the effort I kept putting in.
-
When I Needed Permission to Leave
I knew I wanted to go, but wanting didn’t feel sufficient. I waited for something external to tell me it was okay.
-
How Purpose Became Thin
Purpose didn’t disappear all at once. It gradually lost depth, until it was still present but no longer substantial enough to hold my attention or effort.
-
How Staying Became the Default
I didn’t decide to stay. Staying is just what happened when every day continued without interruption, and no alternative ever demanded to be chosen.
-
When Meaning Didn’t Keep Up With Effort
I kept increasing my effort, assuming meaning would catch up. What changed was realizing that no amount of effort was bringing it any closer.
-
When I Told Myself “Not Yet”
I didn’t refuse to leave. I just kept postponing it with a phrase that sounded temporary, reasonable, and endlessly extendable.